Wednesday, August 08, 2007

I mean it this time. Really.

As long as I can remember, I have been a procrastinator. Why do today what can wait until tomorrow? Then tomorrow comes, and the task gets pushed back yet again. It's ridiculous. Part of it is laziness. Part of it is lack of focus. Increasingly, the focus thing has been popping up more and more, and this is not good. I need to focus, I need to be mindful, and I need to stop procrastinating and avoiding things that need to be done.

So I'm going to do something about it. I'm doing it for my family, and I'm doing it for me. Here are some of the things that I am going to do:

1. I am not going to buy any yarn until after Christmas. What does this have to do with procrastination, you may ask. Well, if I buy yarn, and keep queueing more projects on Ravelry, then all that shopping and queueing will prevent me from actually making crap. You should see our music/yarn/computer room. My stash is like a lava flow that is slowly but surely creeping across the floor into the middle of the room. It's preposterous. I have enough yarn to make approximately 10 sweaters, 8 blankets, and 3 billion scarves. So no more yarn. Today is August 8th. I will not buy yarn before January 8, 2008. It's 5 months; I can do it. I may even try to go longer. I have tried this before in the past, but that's where the focus comes in. I lost focus, and I lost self-control, and I just bought. If I returned all of the yarn I've purchased over the last 2 years, we'd probably have enough money to put a down payment on a new house. Hell, we might even have enough money to buy a new house outright. So no more yarn. Really.

2. I am going to be more patient with the Banana and WT. They love me, and I love them, and I cannot imagine my life without either one of them. So I need to treat them better. I need to focus. I need to think about how my actions affect them. I am not going to neglect my own needs, just be more mindful of theirs. I can do it. I will do it. I want to do it.

3. I am going to stick to a regular exercise regimen. At the age of 34, my cholesterol is already around 250. I am not overweight, but we all know that weight is not the only indication of health. I already have a head-start on this resolution, as I have been going to the gym regularly over the last 2 1/2 weeks, which is pretty good for me. The added encouragement that I have is the Banana. There is a Kids' Klub (sic) at the gym, and she loves to go there. Plus, I want to set a healthy example for her, and I want to be here for her and the rest of my family for a long time.

4. I am going to clean my house. REALLY clean my house. Purge the items that are no longer of any use to us. I hate clutter, and yet I am seemingly surrounded by it, both physically and mentally. I am going to clean all of my closets. I am going to clean all of my kitchen cupboards. I am going to paint. I am going to tear up stained carpets. I am going to vacuum up all of the 23 trillion dead bugs and spiders in my basement. I am going to get rid of the Banana's baby clothes and furniture (don't worry, not ALL of it). I am going to donate anything that is usable to the Goodwill or the St. Vincent de Paul Society. I will donate books to the library. I will get a new address book and actually write down all the addresses and phone numbers in it, rather than having a couple thousand Post-Its fall out each time I need to look up a number. I need to do this to maintain my sanity. I believe in feng shui; right now, the energy in my house is not good. I've been maintaining a level of cleanliness in my house that just keeps us from contracting various horrid diseases. Enough, I say. Enough.

So I'm going to clean up my house, and my relationships, and my life. No more extraneous stuff, in my house or my head. It's time to focus. Fo shizzle. I may even print this post out and put it somewhere where I can see it every day. I need to do this.

This is not to say that I will cease having fun or being silly or a goofball. In fact, I think all of the above will help me to be a happier person. And I'm not just saying that to try to convince myself to stick to this. I truly believe it. So help me out. I might need a little encouragement every now and then.

Thanks you guys.

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At 9:04 AM, Blogger Guinness & Shiloh's Family said...

we'll start our own support group. It needs a very cool name. YA just doesn't cut it. Your post reminds me so much of myself! when you feel tourself getting weak, drop me a note! be strong! I put my rants like this on my other blogg, shhhh.... then you'll see how truely tormented I really am.

At 11:28 AM, Blogger Liz K. said...

Hey, Sal. You seem to be struggling. I'm always here for you, you know, whether to help you through your yarn diet, or whatever you need. I'll always support you.

Call me if you need to talk. You sound like maybe you need to.

At 1:05 PM, Blogger on the wings... said...

Oh, yes, I think there are more of us like this than not...struggling with life and organization and lack of time. In many ways I think technological advances have made it more difficult for us because there are more demands for immediate results and instant fixes.

Know that you are not alone. Keep your goals and focus held tight and true.

At 1:52 PM, Blogger Nancy @ the Jersey Shore said...

good luck on your journey! I totally understand. I need to de-clutter my life too.

At 6:34 PM, Blogger wildtomato said...

It feels so good to declutter, both mentally and physically. I can totally relate. Stay strong! You can do it!

At 5:50 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

start with one room, say the kitchen. today I will clean 2 cabinets, tomorrow I will clean another 2 cabinets, etc. in a week the kitchen is completed.

the onto the next room.

and the next room.


anne marie

At 2:58 PM, Blogger Rae said...

OMG...I could have written this exact same post for myself! Aside from the fact that I have a dog not a daughter (which is probably a little easier). Everything..procrastination, clutter, housework, relationship maintenence, health, etc. I hear you! Why is it so hard? You've inspiried me! (Also, thanks for starting the group on Ravelry!)


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